Someday
I keep waiting for the right time to let go of my words. Thousands of story ideas and plans sit fortified, hidden away in my journal and password-protected WordPress blog. It's time to let them go.
I sit here, day after day, month after month, rutted in the same routine.
“Someday,” sits out there in the sky, giving off a warm glow of inevitability and hope.
Of course, it’s going to happen. Of course, I’ll get there one day.
Someday, I’ll finish my book, get in shape, and lose my dad’s bod. Someday, I’ll make all this money and not have to work anymore. Someday, I’ll have an audience and a message and I’ll change the world.
I feel safe knowing that someday is out there, just waiting for me to catch it.
I’m able to decorate it with hopes and conflate it with ideas. I’m able to imagine it bigger and brighter than ever before and I’m safe knowing it’s up there guiding my way.
But, how is it different than chasing a rainbow or following the North Star?
I can move in the direction I’m imagining, but when will I get there?
I’m never going to catch it until I do this one thing: _________.
Problem is, I don’t know what that one thing is.
I just know that what I’m currently doing isn’t getting me anywhere. What I’m doing is taking me in a direction but it’s never going to deliver me to a location.
I’m going to wake up on my deathbed (or not wake up), and I will never have made it.
There’s something I’m born to do.
Something so much bigger than me.
But one day I will not wake,
and if left undone because I wait.
It’s only then my story dies.
…Sean Openshaw
It will be my biggest regret – that I never got to where I was meant to go. And all my ideas and plans, all my sketches of this amazing world I had planned to build once I got there – will get stored away in a box, along with my cold, dead body.
All I know is that if I wait until all my writing is polished and “ready for publication,” it will be too late.